25+ “Approved” Courtship Pickup Lines

To celebrate the launch of my book Courtship in Crisis I would like to re-post one of my most popular blog posts of all time now with even more pickup lines! Feel free to take a break, have some fun and enjoy some of these “approved” courtship pickup lines.

Feel free to add your own down in the comments. The best ones may get made into memes for the Courtship Pickup Lines Facebook Page and Pinterest Board.

“Approved” Courtship Pickup Lines

"Hey girl, I lost my phone number. Can I have your dad's phone number?"

“Hey girl, I lost my phone number. Can I have your dad’s phone number?”

"Sir, we studied in our homeschool that when a penguin finds its mate they stay together for the rest of their lives. Could your daughter be my penguin?"

“Sir, we studied in our homeschool that when a penguin finds its mate they stay together for the rest of their lives. Could your daughter be my penguin?”

“I’m no Joseph. Could you help me interpret the dreams I’ve been having about your daughter?”

“I’m no Joseph. Could you help me interpret the dreams I’ve been having about your daughter?”

 “Your daughter’s hair is like a flock of goats descending from Mount Gilead.”

“Your daughter’s hair is like a flock of goats descending from Mount Gilead.”

“Sir, you're daughter is the only girl I love now... but soon, I'll love a dozen other girls. They'll all call her 'Mommy’.”

“Sir, your daughter is the only girl I love now… but soon, I’ll love a dozen other girls. They’ll all call her ‘Mommy’.”

 “Can we change the spelling of courtship to put “u” and “i” together?”

“Can we change the spelling of courtship to put “u” and “i” together?”

“Is your daughter a barbarian? Because I keep trying to guard my heart and she gets in anyway.”

“Is your daughter a barbarian? Because I keep trying to guard my heart and she gets in anyway.”

 “Excuse me sir, I believe one of your daughter’s ribs belongs to me.”

“Excuse me sir, I believe one of your daughter’s ribs belongs to me.”

 “My mom told me to write a paper on the finer things in life, and I was wondering: could I interview your daughter?”

“My mom told me to write a paper on the finer things in life, and I was wondering: could I interview your daughter?”

 “Is there a fever spreading in your homeschool? Your daughter looks hot to me.”

“Is there a fever spreading in your homeschool? Your daughter looks hot to me.”

 “Could I get your daughter’s name and number so I can add her to my ‘prayer’ list?”

“Could I get your daughter’s name and number so I can add her to my ‘prayer’ list?”

 “Sir, I am concerned your daughter may be a thief. She stole my heart from across the room.”

“Sir, I am concerned your daughter may be a thief. She stole my heart from across the room.”

“Hey girl, I’m writing a phonebook. Can I have your dad’s number?”

“Hey girl, I’m writing a phone book. Can I have your dad’s number?”

 “I just finished law school. Do you think I am now qualified to to court your daughter?”

“I just finished law school. Do you think I am now qualified to to court your daughter?”

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“Ma’am, did you teach boxing in your homeschool? Because your daughter’s a knockout.” 

 "If your daughter is looking for a knight in shining armor, I happen to be wearing the full armor of God."

“If your daughter is looking for a knight in shining armor, I happen to be wearing the full armor of God.”

 “I will stop loving your daughter on the 30th of February.”

“I will stop loving your daughter on the 30th of February.”

 “Can I follow you home to meet your family? My parents always told me to follow my dreams.”

“Can I follow you home to meet your family? My parents always told me to follow my dreams.”

 “Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like your daughter. Will you like me too?”

“Roses are red. Violets are blue. I like your daughter. Will you like me too?”

 “Sir, are you accepting any applications for a son in law?”

“Sir, are you accepting any applications for a son in law?”

 “Sir, you're daughter’s single. I'm single. Coincidence? I think not.”

“Sir, your daughter’s single. I’m single. Coincidence? I think not.”

 "Care to go to dinner and talk about life, the universe, and everything? I know the perfect place where we can get to know each other. I promise I'll make you fall in love with me. If you want, you can bring your daughter..." (Thanks to John Moore for this one.)

“Care to go to dinner and talk about life, the universe, and everything? I know the perfect place where we can get to know each other. I promise I’ll make you fall in love with me. If you want, you can bring your daughter…” (Thanks to John Moore for this one.) 

 “Sir, does your daughter have a name or can I call her “mine”?”

“Sir, does your daughter have a name or can I call her “mine”?” 

“I love your daughter like a pig loves not being bacon.”

“I love your daughter like a pig loves not being bacon.” 

“Did you invent the airplane? Because your daughter seems Wright for me.”

“Did you invent the airplane? Because your daughter seems Wright for me.”

Sir, are you a terrorist because your daughter's the bomb.

“Sir, are you a terrorist because your daughter’s the bomb.” 

"Hey girl, wanna come over to my house? My parents ARE home."

“Hey girl, wanna come over to my house? My parents ARE home.” 

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Get the Book!

Courtship in Crisis

Bonus Pickup Lines:

“Can I have directions? ‘To where?’ To your daughters heart.”

“Can I borrow a quarter? I want to call my mom and tell her I just met the woman of my dreams.”

More Pickup Lines in the comments

Feel free to add your own down in the comments. The best ones may get made into memes for the Courtship Pickup Lines Facebook Page and Pinterest Board.

Thomas Umstattd Jr. is the author of Courtship in Crisis, the former head of PracticalCourtship.com, and co-founder of the Austin Rhetoric Club, a homeschool speech and debate club in Austin, Texas. He is a professional speaker and CEO of Author Media. He sits on the board of directors for several nonprofits, including the Texas Alliance for Life.

Please note: I reserve the right to delete comments that are offensive or off-topic.

23 thoughts on “25+ “Approved” Courtship Pickup Lines

  1. These are pretty funny! Any of these guys can have my number aaaaaany day they choose. You know, as long as my dad approves. 😛

    • I’m glad there are more people that are planning to court. It gets frustrating when the masses are into the ‘live fast and have fun’ lifestyle. Life is worth so much more than that!

      • You realize all these pickup lines are sarcastic right? The author has been rather obvious about his concerns towards courtship.

    • Who thinks these are appropriate? They are skeezy and treat women as property of their fathers to be passed to their husbands. Horrible.

  2. As an experienced single man who has also observed the dating vs courtship vs betrothal debate, I must add: while dating is not the whole problem, while courtship is not the whole solution, and while the bible neither condemns nor proscribes a procedure, it does condemn pride.

    Here are a three hellish lies your pride will tell you: 1) We have perfected our system of match making which we call _________ and it will protect us from sin, 2) I don’t need accountability with my special girl because I would never stoop to inappropriate conduct, 3) The people who seek to avoid temptation by drawing lines differently than I do are either legalistic, apathetic, or uninformed. A prideful lie such as any of these will condemn you.

    To the proponents and opponents of match making models: remember the guiding principal, the Lord is the avenger of him who goes beyond and defrauds his brother in any matter (1 Thess 4:6). Let’s apply this principal to our own lives with humility and care. With humility — allowing others to apply it differently, and with care — seeking to apply it truly.

    • Think you’re in the wrong room. The place for legitimate well thought out courtship discussions is down the hall and to the right. This place is exclusively for smarting off.

    • Luke, you are dead right. As a parent, although I find these pick-up lines as funny as anyone else would, I tend to find what you say here more in line with the whole conversation at hand. You should post this on another page because it should be read by more than just the joke seekers. Your points are serious and important.

  3. I find these lines to be weird and creepy. Being perverted to the girls themselves it’s one thing, but who thinks it’s a good idea to be perverted to her father?
    I know these are jokes but they were hard for me to read because I know people take them seriously…

  4. Most of these actually kind of creep me out… My family is also completely supportive of the courtship method; however, I think that they would failc to see any humour here. I feel like most of these are disrespectful both to women’s and their families’ parts in such decisions. 🙁

  5. Thank you Luke for standing up no matter what other people say. I believe what you have said to be absolutely right. Stay strong and don’t stray! God will bless you for obeying Him!

  6. My adult daughter recently endured a failed courtship. I wish I had never even heard of the word “courtship.” Six people (2 adults and their 4 parents) have no business being mixed up in a relationship ultimately designed for 2.

    These lines posted here are certainly funny, but I wouldn’t be the least bit surprised if some of them have actually been used.

  7. these are stupid, grow the f*** up. no one uses pick up lines you moron. this is also degrading to women.

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